Sunday, May 3, 2015

Part 2..Understanding Why??????????????


Last Thursday was four weeks since my heart attack and having a stent inserted into one of the arteries. This link gives an excellent explanation as to what is a stent.

Feeling stronger and able to sit at the computer for a few minutes, I have started my research as to what happened to me......the whys...

I have many questions and still need many answers. The American Heart Association and the Canadian Heart and Stroke Foundation have been a great source of information.

In Israel we have the Israel Heart Society. Both their webpage and Facebook page are full of information but because they are only in Hebrew, it takes a lot of time to translate.

Actually, I contacted them by e-mail this morning saying that we have many English speaking olim and since heart disease affects every age group, having an English site would be very useful. .

I'm experiencing many stages in my recovery. So far, each stage has been very important on the road to recovery.

Stage 1: from the day after the heart attack, I felt great and told my doctor that I was bored and wanted to go home. This euphoric feeling lasted five days.

My heart was in shock and didn't realize it was sick. By day six life was changing.

Stage 2: It was the last day of Pesach and I was home. I was exhausted and all I wanted was my bed. My bedroom was dark and when my husband wanted to open the trisim [blinds] to bring in some light, I told him I like the dark. When Avraham suggested that I come and sit in the living room I told him I didn't want to. I think my bedroom was a security blanket.

Stage 3:  the demons invaded my brain...I was so afraid that if I moved the wrong way or just did anything, I would have another heart attack. The dreams were terrifying. Panic and tears were my constant companion. 

I’m still a little afraid to stay alone… Hopefully this too will pass. I was told by a professional, that all I am feeling is very normal.

Our moetza Sdot Negev, installed an emergency panic button machine in our house that contacts a doctor immediately.

Stage 4: this is where I am now. I'm getting stronger and trying to function normally. I still get tired but I'm able to cope better. I have to learn how to pace myself. This is a very difficult skill for me.

My son goes with me for short walks and I try to go a little further each time. I can see my progress daily and have given myself a goal for complete recovery…

I’m sure there are many more stages for me to face before I am totally back to myself.

Next week I have my first post heart attack ultrasound at Soroka. I will then know how my heart is healing.

Writing about my experiences is very therapeutic. It helps me emotionally to deal day to day. Thank-you for reading my words. 

At the end of May, I am going to join a new online support chat group in English, for women in my age group who have heart disease. The moderator is a cardiologist.  From what I understand, the group is made up of 35 women from America and Israel. I’m looking forward to this.

That’s all for now. Please feel free to comment and share.